How He Hates Heights
by PheonixFireBlack
Summary: Not sure really...Hoping it may be a cute lil thing about Ryan's fear of heights. shrug I don't know. Please read, guys! This is only my second OC fan fiction!
1. How He Hates Heights V 10

Title - How He Hates Heights By - PheonixFireBlack Summary - Not sure really...Hoping it may be a cute lil thing about Ryan's fear of heights. *shrug* I don't know. Feedback - LOVE it! E-mail form...don't get many of these...probably because I've never put the option up, eh? Ff.net-Review-form...love getting those. IM form - It would be fun b/c after that....I'd just talk to you in general and talking is fun and something I'm good at--I never shut up, I even talk in my sleep! (You can probably tell if any of you are actually reading this or have read any of my former A/N's...they tend to be a bit long sometimes. Sometimes scary they are so long. LOL!) E-mail - In my profile. E-mail me any comments/suggestions/ect.../how many more of these damn back-slashes am I gonna use?! LOL! IM - Also in the profile. Message me if ya want! Rating - PG. For...um...a few not too bad words.  
  
A/N - I know, I know...the title is kinda dorky/corny/stupid/weird/strange/odd/ect... but...I liked it. It's the first one I came up with and I have to say, I'm proud of this title. Why? Because I actually made the title before I made the fic...and that NEVER happens with me. If it's a one-shot...I figure it out a bit after I get done...a chaptered fic...it could be Ch 6 before I know what to title it. LOL!  
  
Ok...All title issues aside: I really have no clue where this is going but...I just got done watching "The Heights" and I'm kind of hoping for a cute lil Ryan/Rissa thing...and his (odd but cute - in my opinion) fear of heights is going to be involved *grin* Seth/Summer relationship is mentioned...a bit...lol  
  
Also, I kinda sorta in a way don't live in Cali but...I'd assume that they have a Six Flags...right? If not...they do now! And...also...I know that other states have Six Flags and whatnot but I don't know if they all have the same coasters...well...I'm gonna use my local Six Flags as an example so...if any of you out there live in California ...correct me if ya feel like it! lol! Anyway, not like you guys are reading this so...I'm gonna stop writing this A/N and...uh...write. LOL!  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
It was the first day of summer vacation and everyone thought it hadn't come  
soon enough and they all knew it would end way too soon. It was your typical first-day of summer: Sun shining, birds annoyingly chirping, people walking around in shorts, tank tops and flip flops, you know, your typical cliche first-day of summer vacation thing. Seth, Summer, Ryan, and Marissa were sitting around in the pool house trying to figure out what the hell  
they should do during their summer vacation.  
  
"Why don't we just sit around...and do nothing...in the pool house...like we are...right...now..." Seth said sarcastically.  
  
"Oh do shut up, Seth." Marissa said, rolling her eyes.  
  
"Well, I didn't hear anyone else coming up with anything, so I decided to say something. It seemed like a good thing to do...talk amongst all the silence."  
  
"Seth...really...shut up." Ryan said. For some reason, Seth had really been getting on his nerves today.  
  
"Dude, what's wrong with you today? I know I get on your nerves but...you've really been on edge today...It's summer vacay, dude! The time when you should be....not edgy..." Seth frowned. Wasn't there some word that was the opposite of 'edgy'?  
  
"Do you think I don't realize that it's summer vacation, Seth?"  
  
He shrugged, "I dunno...I just like reiterating the fact on the first day..."  
  
Summer shook her head, "I'm surprised he hasn't made a comment..." She said to Marissa.  
  
"I know...something about it always being like summer vacation or something, I have to say I am definitely shocked."  
  
"What are you two talking about?" Seth was obviously lost...or confused, or maybe both.  
  
Summer turned her head to look at her boyfriend, "Well...since you keep going on about Summer vacation," She put major emphasis on "Summer", "We were just shocked that you haven't made a comment on it yet."  
  
"Oh, you mean something like: It doesn't matter what time of year it is because for me, it's always Summer vacation."  
  
Summer rolled her eyes, "Yeah...something corny like that."  
  
"Summer...what are you talking about? There was nothing horny about that statement. I'll admit it was a little sad and demented and...fluffy but really, I don't see anything horny about it."  
  
All four of the teenagers laughed. "Seth! You know I said c-o-r-n-y." She practically spelled the word out for him.  
  
"Of course I do, I just couldn't resist."  
  
After a few moments of extremely strange silence, Summer spoke again, "Ok, honestly...starting to get bored now...We need to think of something to do and go do so."  
  
"Oh! I have a great idea!" Marissa exclaimed suddenly.  
  
"What?" Seth and Summer chorused.  
  
"We could go to Six Flags...or...some amusement park."  
  
Summer and Seth looked at each other, shrugged, nodded, and turned back to Marissa. "Sounds good ta me." Seth said.  
  
"I couldn't agree more. Great idea, Coop."  
  
"Could you not come up with a different nickname for me, Sum?"  
  
Summer seemed to think about it for a moment, "No...I don't think so."  
  
"Why can't you call me 'Rissa like practically everyone else does?"  
  
"Because...that would suck, calling you something everyone else does...and plus, Chino over there was the one who started that, I don't want to steal something so...original..." She rolled her eyes upon saying the word, "From your boyfriend."  
  
It was Marissa's turn to roll her eyes, "Fine, fine, whatever."  
  
"So, when are we gonna go?" Seth asked eagerly.  
  
"Well...I don't know." Marissa said.  
  
"How about...Friday? That's only two days from today." Summer suggested.  
  
"Do you think we don't realize that Wednesday is two days before Friday, babe?" Seth asked his girlfriend. "I know you guys know but I just wanted to talk...and never call me babe again, Cohen."  
  
"Right."  
  
"So, Friday?" Marissa said, looking from Summer and Seth in front of her, who both nodded furiously, to her boyfriend who was to her right and slightly behind her. "Is that cool with you, Ry?"  
  
He nodded, "Yeah, it's fine."  
  
"Well...I gotta go home. Drive me, Cohen?" Summer said.  
  
Seth nodded and as he stood he asked, "Summer, can't you call me Seth...now that we're, ya know, dating?"  
  
She threw her head back to look at him, "No!" She declared before running out the door to go to the driveway.  
  
Once Ryan knew that Seth was out of ear-shot, he spoke. "Marissa..."  
  
"Yeah?" She turned to look at him.  
  
"An amusement park?"  
  
"Yeah...come on, it'll be fun!"  
  
"'Rissa...did you forget?"  
  
She frowned, "Forget what?"  
  
"Carnival...Ferris wheel...me...heights...don't mix."  
  
"Oh, God! I didn't even think about that! Uh...Well...um, we could always...not go."  
  
"No...'Rissa...you three can go but...I think it's kinda pointless for me to go."  
  
"I mean..we as in you and I."  
  
"No, I mean...I don't want you to not do something that you want to because of me."  
  
"Ryan, I've been to Six Flags, I'm pretty sure that not a whole lot changed in two years. And if it did," She shrugged, "So what, I'll have Seth tell me everything about it...he'll practically have me on the ride."  
  
Ryan smirked and shook his head, "Maybe so but...I just don't want you to stay here because of me."  
  
"Ryan...if you don't go, I don't want to go...I don't want to be surrounded by Summer and Seth making out every chance they get. Which, mind you, would be a lot...all the walking around and waiting in line you have to do." She shuddered. "It's just..." She made a gagging sound.  
  
Ryan laughed, "That's true, but it's not as bad as when he was dating Anna. Now that...that was scary."  
  
"Yeah...they were...too perfect." She shuddered. "That scared me greatly." She said as she went over to where Ryan was and lay down next to him. "So...you gonna go?"  
  
"I don't know...How about I tell you Friday?"  
  
"Today!" She said with a mock-argumentative tone.  
  
"Friday, 'Rissa."  
  
"Ok...Tomorrow then." She said as she made her way to sit next to Ryan and lean into him.  
  
"Fri-day..." He held word out.  
  
Marissa giggled, "Alright, alright. Friday then."  
  
~*~*~  
  
Friday came a lot quicker than any of the quartet had thought possible. It was shocking really. It's not that two days ever went by too terribly slow but it always seemed that when one was anticipating something, the day or time that whatever they were anticipating came much too late, no matter how  
soon it came. Though this Friday came so quickly that one would almost think that someone had sped up time.. However, Friday came almost too soon for Ryan. He had decided what he would do, now to get Marissa alone to tell her. He really didn't need anything coming from Seth. God forbid if he ever found out about Ryan's fear of heights. That would be one nightmare that Ryan would rather not come true, just because of the teasing he would get  
from Seth.  
  
Ryan was finally able to get Marissa alone when Seth and Summer went to Seth's room to make out. Thank God, I don't want to watch them make out any  
more than I have to. Ryan had thought. "Finally...alone."  
  
"I know...You'd really start to think that neither one of them have lives outside this pool house."  
  
"And what about you? You're here just as much as either of them."  
  
"But I have a reason. My boyfriend lives in this pool house." She smiled, then changed the subject as quick as a lightning flash, "Now, how about it? Going? Staying? Standing in the road between?"  
  
"I'll go. I'm not promising that I'll do anything...but I'll go." He paused before muttering, "Even if it is pointless."  
  
"It's not pointless, Ryan! You could be...the...refreshment holder...dude...guy...person." She frowned at her own statement and quickly said, "Ok, so that sounds kind of lame and boring but...I won't go on all the rides...I'll keep you company." She nodded.  
  
"As long as its you and not Seth and Summer..." He said, leaning in to kiss her.  
  
"I wouldn't leave you alone with those two for anything." Marissa said, separating from him.  
  
~*~*~  
  
It seemed to take five days just to get to Six Flags, even though it was probably only about two and a half or maybe three hours. Maybe the length  
had something to do with the fact that everyone in the whole of Orange County seemed to be going in the same direction as the quartet. Maybe the entire county had the same idea. Well...maybe not but it was still a nice  
comparison, right?  
  
"When are we gonna get there?" Summer complained, "I'm bored and I wanna go on the Titan!"  
  
"You're going to go on the Titan?" Seth asked. His girlfriend nodded, "Summer Anne Roberts is going on the Titan. I think we need to broadcast this on the news, man!"  
  
Summer giggled, "No we don't." "You made a huge deal about not going on it last year."  
  
"That was before I became a roller coaster-height junkie!"  
  
"Yeah...the whole thing about you being scared of heights was funny."  
  
"No it wasn't! Especially not with all the shit you gave me about it after you found out."  
  
"Ooohhh...Summer said 'shit' let's have a parade!"  
  
"Oh shut up, Seth!"  
  
"She called me Seth." He said, pointing at Summer, looking at Marissa, who was in the front passenger's seat. "Dude!" He suddenly took up the entire rear-view mirror, "She called me Seth!"  
  
"Dude..." Ryan said in a flat tone, "Get out of the rear-view mirror."  
  
"Who do you think decided to call it 'rear-view mirror' were do you think they came up with the name? I mean...it had to be a guy, right?" Seth questioned.  
  
"I don't think that when whoever decided to call it 'rear-view mirror' meant that the driver would see the heads of the people behind the them." Ryan said sarcastically.  
  
"Ooohhh...Sarcastic Ryan...creepy..."  
  
Marissa turned in her seat, looking at Seth, "Honestly, Seth...shut up! I can't even hear the music over you."  
  
"Honestly, Marissa, I obviously don't know how to shut up. My brain doesn't register what those two words mean. I talk in my sleep for cripes sake!"  
  
"What does sleep-talking have to do with--Nevermind."  
  
"Summer...why do they hate me?"  
  
"I don't know...but you do have some pretty annoying qualities, ya know?"  
  
"Really? Like what?"  
  
"Well...I'd rather not discuss them right now..." She said, grinning and waiting for the reactions of the two in the front.  
  
"Good Lord! That's just wrong!" Marissa practically shouted, covering her ears.  
  
"I could have gone the day, or my life, without knowing that." Ryan said.  
  
"But...I didn't say what was annoying about him...just that I'd rather not talk about it right now."  
  
Seth, catching on to what Summer was doing said, "Oh c'mon, Summer. You tell me what it is, and I'll tell you something."  
  
"You couldn't possibly want Chino or Coop up there to know this Seth." She grinned, glad he had caught on. "And plus...it's not like there's anything annoying about me anyway." She said, a bit of conceit shining through.  
  
"You may want to know, Seth, but we don't." Marissa and Ryan chorused.  
  
"Alright...fine...we'll talk about it later..." Seth said, sounding convincingly enough, saddened at the fact that he couldn't know what it was. Actually, now, he was going to have to bring that up with Summer later. Now he was curious as to just what it was that annoyed her.  
  
~*~*~  
  
It wasn't long and they finally entered the Six Flags parking lot, but it was nearly twenty-three minutes before they actually got to park the car.  
Then they stood in line fjor about two hours; One of those hours in the sun, the other under the awning that was at least provided for part of the  
boringness that was waiting in line to get their tickets.  
  
"I'm booored! This is boring, Cohen, do something.  
  
"Really...I still don't understand why you can't call me Seth." She rolled her eyes but watched as Seth tapped the guy that was in front of them on the shoulder. He was about their age. "Hi...I was just wondering: Are you gay?" Seth narrowly missed the punch the guy nearly hit him with.  
  
"I see you've taken out this special time to almost get clobbered and killed by someone you don't know." Ryan said.  
  
"I like to do things like that...Now I'm going to have to try and avoid this guy the rest of the day or...I think he may actually kill me."  
  
"And since you don't know him, you never know...He might be able to kill you and make it look like an accident." Marissa winked at Seth.  
  
"Thank you, Marissa, for always looking at the positive side of things. Gotta love ya for it."  
  
"Any time, Seth, any time." With that, they finally reached the ticket desk, paid for them, got stamped, and finally, after what seemed like forever, entered the park.  
  
"Split up?" Seth asked.  
  
"Why?" Marissa counter-asked.  
  
Seth shrugged, "I dunno...it just seemed like a good thing to say."  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
It was almost four hours later when the quartet decided that they might go on the Titan. Surprisingly enough to Ryan, Seth had yet to make a comment  
on his not doing much. Ryan figured it was one of two things: 1.) Seth decided it was just because Ryan wasn't a people-person, or 2.) Seth was too busy with Summer to really realize much anything else. He figured it  
could be either one, it was purely fifty-fifty on which was the real  
answer.  
  
"Alright...let's see...water rides..." Seth started.  
  
"Check." Summer said, who was still wet from the last one.  
  
"Wooden coaster..."  
  
"Check."  
  
"Various other coasters..." "Check."  
  
"What's that leave?"  
  
"Well...there's games...but that seems pointless. No one can win those things, you simply waste time trying." Marissa said.  
  
"There's the best for last..." Summer grinned at Seth. "The Titan!" The couple unified, laughing afterwards.  
  
"Alright! Let's go!" Seth said with enthusiasm, no mocking tone in sight.  
  
"We haven't all gone on one ride today...Let's all go on this one!" Summer exclaimed. "We can all go together on one freakin' ride for once!" With that, she ran to catch up with Seth, simply to slow him down and tell him that they were all going on this one together, even though she didn't get an answer from the other two.  
  
"This is great..." Ryan said.  
  
"You don't have to ride it if you don't want to." Marissa told him.  
  
"And have Summer and Seth question me all the way back home?" He shook his head, "I don't think so."  
  
"So...you're gonna go?"  
  
As the two were slightly behind the other couple and they looked up at the orange-colored roller coaster, Ryan looked at Marissa. "You remember the Ferris Wheel, right?"  
  
"Uh-huh..."  
  
"That was...what? Fifty feet off the ground."  
  
"Yeah...probably."  
  
"Well, if you remember that...think about how I'm going to be when we're almost two hundred and fifty feet higher."  
  
Marissa sighed, "Yeah...wow...Wow." Was all she could say as she imagined it.  
  
"Yeah...That's a word that comes to mind, along with a few others."  
  
"What other words come to your mind, Ryan Atwood?" She asked teasingly, looking up at him.  
  
"I'd rather not say." Ryan said, all the while thinking: Shit mother fucker.  
  
"Oohh...That bad?"  
  
He nodded, "Yeah...that bad."  
  
"So? Go or not?"  
  
Ryan sighed, "Let's see...the choices are: Ride the damn roller coaster and get it over with or not ride the damn thing and...have questions about why I hardly did anything today."  
  
"Oh, you forgot: Fess up and be unmercifully teased by Seth Cohen for the rest of your natural born life."  
  
"Because I'm going to choose number three...right?"  
  
"No." She sighed, "So..."  
  
It was Ryan's turn to sigh, "I guess I'll go for it."  
  
"Alright..."  
  
And with that, the four waited in the line for about an hour and a half before even thinking about getting on the ride. Then...they got on. The seats were for two and set in several rows. Marissa and Ryan were going to have to sit in the very front of the train. Oh God, this is going to be hell. Ryan thought as he and Marissa sat down. "'Rissa..." He cast her a glance.  
  
She shrugged, "Keep your eyes closed?" She suggested half-heartedly, shrugging.  
  
Ryan sighed. Yep...this was going to be hell. They just had to be in front of Summer and Seth, didn't they? They couldn't have gotten behind the two. How had that even happened? Seth and Summer and had been in front of them for awhile. Oh, that was right, they got bored, starting making out and he and Marissa had stepped in front of them. Damn. Why did they do that? They couldn't have gotten in the second row. Nope...they got front row seats and all hell and havoc was going to be going through Ryan's mind. "You know what you could do? Think...happy...thoughts. Oh wow that's lame." Marissa paused in her whispering to him, frowning, "But if it works...ya know...just...do that. And if you can't..uh...think...think of...me...us...something! I don't know just don't think about the roller coaster." She seemed a bit frantic. She hadn't expected for them to be first and front row. Oh well, that's how life went, you were always supposed to expect the unexpected.  
  
"Well...here goes nothing..." Ryan muttered as the train started to roll forward. This was really going to be hell.  
  
~*~*~  
  
The quartet were making their way to the parking lot after the Titan so  
they could go home. They'd done everything they wanted to do, seen  
everything they wanted to see, and spent a little more money than they  
wanted to spend, it was officially time to leave. Like the entire day, Summer and Seth were in the lead while Ryan and Marissa followed them, a few steps behind and out of general ear-shot. "'I swear to God, Marissa, if  
you ever happen to actually be able to get me into an amusement park  
again..."  
  
"It's not really my fault. You didn't have to go on the stupid roller coaster. You could have stayed down here, your feet flat on the ground. You made that choice, not me."  
  
"I know...but...if you do ever get me here again...stop me, hit me in the back of the head, tell me to think, jog my memory about this, and firmly tell me that I should stay on the ground."  
  
"Sir, yes, sir!" She said with a salute.  
  
When the Marissa and Ryan got to the vehicle in which they arrived in, they were neither one shocked to see Seth against the side of the van and Summer  
kissing him. It was almost as if the two were some stupid sappy romance movie that you could just fall asleep in and by the time you woke up, even though the movie wasn't over, it wouldn't be like you had missed anything because the characters were always doing the same thing. When one thought  
actually thought about it, one would tend to think that, quite frankly,  
that's kinda sad that anyone's life could be that...well...predictable. Once everyone was in the car, Summer immediately asked, "So, why didn't you  
actually do anything, Chino?"  
  
"I don't know if you've realized this or not but...I'm not much of a people- person. You were lucky enough to actually get me in the park." "Well...I don't think I had anything to do with it...maybe Coop did though." Summer grinned.  
  
"He came of his own free will, Summer." Marissa said, rolling her eyes.  
  
"That's not what I mean...maybe he had a little...persuasion." She raised her eyebrows.  
  
Marissa rolled her eyes again. Good Lord what that girl could come up with sometimes. And especially after she and Seth had sex. It was quite annoying.  
  
The drive home went just like the drive there did; Lots of talk from Summer and Seth, questions here and there from one of them that Ryan, Marissa, or both had to answer, Marissa yelling at Seth because he was talking over the music, Summer yelling at her for yelling at Seth, Seth yelling for both of them to stop yelling, and then there was more talk. The entire way home, no one brought up anything that would make Seth any wiser about Ryan's fear of  
heights. All was right and well in the world...Or at least in Orange  
County.  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
A/N - So..it was cute...right? Ok...I thought it was...but I did write it. *shrug* Oh well. It doesn't matter. I wrote it, I like it, you read it, and if you like it, review me! If you see how I could have made it better, tell me! If you want to flame me you can but...if your going to flame me...be  
the one single BRAVE flamer and leave a penname or e-mail address so I  
don't have to start some kind of war with you...that might be a little entertaining for the other readers (if they are odd and strange like me)  
but...I don't think I want to start a war with ANYONE here.  
  
Next subject on the agenda: I just want you guys to know that there will be a second version of this story. It may appear that there are two chapters, but really...there aren't...the second "chapter" will just be the second version of this fic. The next one won't be quite as happy and fun (...Yes, that's what I consider this one--especially compared to the other one.) it  
might be...not quite angsty I don't think but...it will definitely be boarder lining angst...er...I think it might...I don't know, don't have any  
of it written down anywhere other than my head. *grin*  
  
Later days,  
~PFB 


	2. How He Hates Heights V 20

Title - How He Hates Heights version 2.0 By - PheonixFireBlack Summary - Not sure really...Hoping it may be a cute lil thing about Ryan's fear of heights. *shrug* I don't know. Feedback - LOVE it! E-mail form...don't get many of these...probably because I've never put the option up, eh? Ff.net-Review-form...love getting those. IM form - It would be fun b/c after that....I'd just talk to you in general and talking is fun and something I'm good at--I never shut up, I even talk in my sleep! (You can probably tell if any of you are actually reading this or have read any of my former A/N's...they tend to be a bit long sometimes. Sometimes scary they are so long. LOL!) E-mail - In my profile. E-mail me any comments/suggestions/ect.../how many more of these damn back-slashes am I gonna use?! LOL! IM - Also in the profile. Message me if ya want! Rating - G. There isn't anything bad...unless a bit of fluff is a crime.  
  
A/N - Just like I told you, here's the second version of the fic. By the way, for future reference of this - If I get anything wrong here...I'm sorry but I didn't start watching the show until the New Years episode. For some seriously bizarre reason, when it started, the OC didn't appeal to me much. Then I learned about the 5th season of Angel and I watched it. They started re-running and for like...three weeks I watched the OC and...now I'm hooked. At first I thought I might have tv issues but...I decided I'd just catch Angel when it re-runs on WB this summer. ANYWAY...uh...yeah. I kinda know a bit about what I need to know for writing this (thanks to donatellomarks love ya for it too! lol) so...don't worry, I don't think it'll be too terribly off. Well, I think that's all till later. See ya! *grin**wink* (also - I'm saying that Marissa and Ryan are like...17, kay? ok...)  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
He was only about six years old. He had sandy blonde hair and blue eyes with a hint of gray in them. He was a fairly small child, bone structure and whatnot. He had practically had to beg his mother to take him to the park. Well, a six year old's perception of begging--it was more like asking three or four times while she ran around trying to find her keys. It wasn't that she wanted to take him, but he was really getting annoying--He had been asking her about this for three days so she finally gave in. She wasn't sure why he wanted to go to the park so badly but it didn't matter, she took him anyway. He immediately made a bee-line for the big oak tree in the center of the park and started climbing it. She shook her head. It was kind of funny how adventurous he could be sometimes. She slowly made her way to get a little nearer to the tree to keep a better watch on him, but only because she couldn't let him fall and die or get seriously hurt. He paused in his climbing and look down at his mother, "You'll help me when I wanna get down, right mama?"  
  
That was the only thing she never understood; he would climb the tree on his own, but he never would get down alone, she always helped him. The only logical reason she could come up with was that maybe he was afraid of heights, though he probably wouldn't climb the tree had than been it, or falling, it had to be one or the other. "Yes...I'll help you down." She said, annoyed already.  
  
It wasn't long after they had arrived, maybe fifteen minutes, when he called for his mother. "Mama!" He didn't get an answer. "Mama!" He shouted a little louder. Still nothing. He looked around and saw her not far away, talking to some man he did not know. He frowned. Who was he? And why wasn't his mom paying attention to him? She should be over here with him, not over there with that guy. "Ma-ma!" He held the name out just in time to see her start to walk away with the guy. "Mama!" He called, loud as he could, "Mama! Mama!" She kept on walking as if she couldn't even hear him. Tears formed in his eyes and he blinked in attempt to try and make them go away but this only made them spill. "Mama..." He muttered before yelling out for her again. She was just getting farther and farther away. This was backwards. She should be getting closer, not farther away. He bit his lip in another effort to stop the tears but it was useless, they came anyway. He didn't understand this. Why was she walking away? "MAMA!" He tried to get her attention once more. The woman turned to glance back at him but quickly turned back to the man she was conversing with. He got it now. She wasn't coming back. Not for a long time now. It wasn't that she was really ever always there, she would drink all the time, but to him she was really still there, he was only six, he didn't understand the concept of what getting drunk was. The pair had stopped now, several yards away, and were sitting on the bench there, talking away. That was it. She wasn't coming back...  
  
Ryan half-sat, half-lay there in his bed, thinking about the time that his mother had left him there, in that stupid oak tree in the park. That, he had decided a long time ago, was the cause of his fear of heights. He was actually probably born with it, but that's what he liked to blame it on-- his mother--or at least, the woman that gave birth to him; Ryan considered Kirsten more of a mother than his own She had actually left the park with him--AJ. It was odd how no one else in the park seemed to notice the little boy in the tree that had been crying for hours and was, even if only seemingly to them, stuck in the tree. When she came back it was almost dark. She came runshing back, crying and stumbling over her apologies to her son. He knew she didn't mean any of it--now--but then, he was only six, of course he forgave her immediately but now, looking back, he wished he hadn't. He rubbed the center of his forehead slightly. "Stupid...dream...stupid memories..." he muttered.  
  
"Mmm...What?" Someone next to him murmured. Marissa had snuck into the pool house earlier claiming that she missed her boyfriend and wanted to be in his presence.  
  
Ryan didn't hear her and continued to mutter to himself, "Stupid...dream...memories...God, what a bitch."  
  
"What?" Marissa asked, shocked, sitting up almost immediately. "Ryan Atwood, are you talking to, or about, me?"  
  
Ryan turned his head to look at her, eyes wide, "Oh, no, Marissa," He said quickly, "No....God, no...not you. I was...I was talking about my mother...or...the woman that gave birth to me, Kirsten is more like a mother to me than...that...fucking little bitch has ever been." Ryan closed his eyes immediately after he said that. He hadn't meant to say that, and especially not in front of Marissa. "Marissa..." He sighed, "I'm sorry...I.- I don't...she just--"  
  
"I know," Marissa intervened, "I know she really pisses you off....the mere thought of the woman upsets you and--" She cut herself off. "What happened?"  
  
"What?"  
  
"What did she do that has you so ticked off? I mean..I woke up and heard you muttering stuff to yourself. What happened?"  
  
"It was...just this...dream that I've been having lately. Memory-dream kinda..."  
  
"Memory-dream?" She was obviously confused and had never heard the term before.  
  
"Yeah...it's not really a dream because its actually a memory that you haven't thought about, and won't...until you subconscious opens up the box you have the memories that you'd rather forget and puts it in your head again." He paused, "Does that make sense at all?"  
  
Marissa smiled, "It makes perfect sense." She suddenly looked concerned, it was amazing how quickly her mood and facial expressions could changes sometimes. "Ryan, I've kind of been worrying about you. You've kind of been on edge like..all week. This is why, isn't it? This isn't the first time that your mind opened that secret, wish you could forget them forever memory box, is it?"  
  
Ryan sighed and sat up, leaning against his pillow, shaking his head, "No...this...this has been going on all week and...I just...I want it to go away again. This has been in the back of my mind for...at least ten, if not eleven years. This memory was in that box for a reason. Because I didn't want to remember it. I wanted to forget it...forever...but...I guess the box in my mind is too full, my mind has to let some of it loose." He sighed again, raising his hands, then lightly clapping them together to have them fall in his lap.  
  
"Ryan..." Marissa started, touching his arm, "What was the dream about?"  
  
"Three days...I asked her if she would take me to the park...'No, not today, Ryan. Maybe tomorrow'...or...'No, you little brat, go play in your room' There was always some excuse." He shook his head, "Finally she agreed, probably out of annoyance. Took me...I climbed the big oak tree that was in the center of the park--sounds like a movie cliche, huh?" He chuckled a bit, though it wasn't all that happy, "I asked her, and she said that she would help me down when I wanted to get down from the tree--I'd climb up on my own...never would come down alone though...it was strange." He paused, "Anyway, about fifteen minutes later, I call for her, no answer. I tried again, still nothing. I looked around and saw her talking to him-- AJ."  
  
Ryan sighed, "I called for her at least four times, if not more...never payed one bit of attention to me, except for the last shout. She payed me a glance, then went back to talking to him. She actually left me at the park, Marissa. She left me, I was six years old. She got so damn caught up with AJ--that bastard--that she completely forgot about her six year old son." Marissa's eyes were wide as a full moon. "Yeah." Ryan nodded. "But don't worry, she came back...at nearly dark. Crying...apologizing...the whole works. I was too young to not forgive her--she was mother...so I did...and we went home. And guess what happened? When we got home, she called for a babysitter and went off to drown herself in her...I don't know...forgetfulness, I guess."  
  
"How can a mother forget about her six year old son?" Marissa was on the verge of yelling.  
  
Ryan tried to quiet her, "Marissa...that was eleven years ago...it's ok. Really...she's gone...she's not in my life anymore."  
  
"I know but...you were six for cripe's sake...how could she forget you?"  
  
"That my mom for ya..." Ryan raised his eyebrows and let the fall a millisecond later. Silence enveloped the two for a few moments but Ryan finally spoke again. "Ya know, I know its kind of dumb, but...I've kind of always blamed her for it."  
  
"For what?"  
  
"Well, pretty much everything but...in specifics here: The...heights thing..."  
  
"The heights thing?" Marissa repeated, practically giggling.  
  
"Alright..if you want to be so technical...my fear of heights."  
  
Marissa smiled, "Well...that's what it is.."  
  
Ryan smiled and Marissa couldn't help but kiss him. When they separated and as the two lay back down, Ryan spoke. "You know, for some reason...I think I might sleep better tonight." Marissa giggled and lay her head on his shoulder before ever quickly falling asleep. It wasn't long after that Ryan fell into a nice, peaceful, Marissa-filled sleep.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
A/N - Ok, so...how was it? A bit different from the last one, eh? lol. Do you think it would/could be considered fluff? I wasn't sure...I don't write much of it, ya know? Lol. Tell me what ya think! Oh, and yes, to any of you that are wondering or are going to comment on it, I do realize that each of these "versions" of this fic could serve as their own one- shots...But that's only had I wished to think of another title, but I'm not that great on coming up with fic titles so...they just went under this one lol  
  
Later days, ~PFB 


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